How are the relations in the family between children born with a large age difference. What you should pay attention to parents.
The ideal difference between first and second child in the family are considered to be three to four years. This fact was already proved by psychologists. But there are cases when parents delay the emergence of a second baby for a longer period. The reasons may be very different: health problems, unstable financial situation, lack of work. Because the second child can be born much later the first baby and parents will need to make the effort to the eldest son or daughter feel unwelcome.
The older child can be difficult to accept the fact that he is no longer the only one in the family. This is especially true for boys. Girls, on the contrary, delighted to perceive the infant’s behaviour in the family, willing to follow the stages of its development, rejoice in the first steps and words, baby. This is because at the age of 12-13 in girls, a period of «strengthening» the maternal instinct, it’s nature. The boy will flatter that from now on he is the protector of the younger.
Parents in such cases, transfer a part of duties to care for the baby for an older child. But it should be remembered that at the age of 13-14 years old children enter a transitional period characterized by emotional explosions, caused by hormonal changes in the body. The psyche in this period is the most vulnerable. Therefore, the child may feel abandoned if their parents are actively engaged to care for the baby. Indeed, in this case the eldest child will assume that he gets attention only when caring for the younger.
Remember how your firstborn loved the baby, he still needs personal free time and space, it also requires your attention and love. It is important that the teenager had his own corner where he could retire. No need to turn his room into the nursery.
After finishing school on the shoulders of the teenager lie down more difficult problems. This is the final and entrance exams, many new Hobbies and acquaintances. Often the eldest child is in high reputation among the younger than the parents. After all, he can tell exciting stories, to indulge in secret from parents sweets. And the firstborn feel their importance, patronising attitude to their younger brothers and sisters. During this period, children between the established warm and close relationships. Between them there is no rivalry. So do not be afraid of having a second baby when your firstborn is already «almost adult». With the right approach to the education of both children will feel loved and significant.