Communicating with your child, we do not think about the fact that some of our phrases can have very negative consequences for baby’s delicate psyche and cause the child substantial harm. What phrases to avoid in conversation with a child?
«Don’t go to sleep – do’er take away», «you will Not listen – will pass in children’s home». Intimidating the child, we make him a neurotic and generated fear and then it would be difficult to remove even with the help of a good psychologist.
«Wally! Let me do it!» Hampering attempts by the child to act independently, you are cultivating it lack of initiative, lack of confidence and indecisiveness.
«Look at her, what she’s like slender, and you’re still on the rolls lean…», «Misha is a straight-a student, and you’re an idiot». No need to compare your child with other children – so can be formed in a small inferiority complex, which in the future will bring him many problems and disappointments.
«You’re my most beautiful», «Your classmates and you couldn’t hold a candle!» To praise the child is also harmful as nedovolil. The result of excessive zakalivanie are arrogance, high self-esteem and «star disease». These «star» children often have conflicts with peers, and practically no friends.
«When you are so disobedient, I don’t love you». A mother’s love is the basis of the attitude of the person, his ability to be happy. The child must be convinced that his love is always and under all circumstances. Otherwise, undermined his faith in himself, arise resentment, fear and sense of inferiority.
«If not for you, I would have made a successful career», «If I didn’t have so much to dick around with you, I’d look better.» Not shoulder on the fragile shoulders of a child responsibility for your failures, do not make him feel guilty that your life is a failure.
«All right, take this candy – just leave me alone!» Succumbing to the entreaties of the child, you give him power over you. Realizing that you can «break» the whims or whining, the child will begin to use them regularly to achieve their goals.